{"id":1233,"date":"2013-04-08T13:52:35","date_gmt":"2013-04-08T17:52:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.positivelyparenting.com\/?p=1233"},"modified":"2015-12-04T12:49:10","modified_gmt":"2015-12-04T17:49:10","slug":"tired-of-the-time-out-here-are-some-alternatives","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/parenting\/tired-of-the-time-out-here-are-some-alternatives\/","title":{"rendered":"Tired of the Time Out? Here are some alternatives…."},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
In my previous post, we discussed the efficacy of time-outs and why, ultimately, I am going to rarely recommend them. \u00a0Time-outs stop working, then the parent soon starts to struggle and fight with the child to get them into the designated spot and stay there. \u00a0This struggle only grows more power struggles between the parent and the child.<\/p>\n

So, what\u00a0is<\/em>\u00a0a parent to do with the hitting, scratching, fit-throwing, biting, kicking menace that has replaced their beautiful and calm toddler?<\/p>\n

\"Photo<\/a><\/p>\n
Photo Credit: Ken Wilcox<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

 <\/p>\n

Here are some replacement ideas for the time-out!<\/strong><\/p>\n

1. \u00a0Prevent, prevent, prevent.<\/strong>\u00a0 When you really look at your schedule, you can oftentimes see patterns of when your child is misbehaving the most.\u00a0 It is before nap time?\u00a0 Lunch?\u00a0 Are they bored and cranky around 4:30 pm every day?\u00a0 Toddlers and young pre-k children can be tough…there can appear to be no patterns!\u00a0 It is a useful to look…so take note and make a plan for prevention.\u00a0 Do you need to carry healthy snacks?\u00a0 Have you been correctly reading the exhaustion signs?\u00a0 Can you cut a play date or activity off a bit earlier to side-step the misbehavior?\u00a0 Are you asking too much of your child (sitting at a table for 30 minutes each night)?\u00a0 Are you not giving your child any freedom or responsibility (a two year old can start to set the table, tear lettuce, etc.)?\u00a0 Asking yourself these questions can be the best medicine…prevention!<\/p>\n

2. \u00a0Divert, divert, divert.<\/strong>\u00a0 If the misbehavior is just beginning, I strongly recommend you find something (anything) else to focus on!\u00a0 “Look, David!\u00a0 Did you see the bird?\u00a0 Let’s look together!\u00a0 Or “Lauren, will you help me find my new pen!\u00a0 I think I left it over here…”\u00a0 Or “Who wants to have a dance party?”\u00a0 Or “Let’s put together this puzzle…”\u00a0 The point is, parents often want to spend time talking to their kids about the misbehavior in the hopes of “teaching a lesson,” but diverting your young two year old’s attention is a more effective brain-based way of handling it!<\/p>\n

3. \u00a0Speaking of understanding the brain<\/strong>…your young child does not have the brain matter to handle the lectures about behavior.\u00a0 When the behavior has become unacceptable, you scoop up the child, say “No Hitting” once, sternly and quietly.\u00a0 You move that child into another situation, room, option, or choice…but they cannot return to the infraction and nor should you continue talking.\u00a0 For the immature brain it is action,\u00a0not<\/strong>\u00a0words, that matter the most.\u00a0 As soon as your child does something acceptable, you say, “thank you for helping me clean up the dining room floor, look how clean it is!” with a big hug.\u00a0 You are moving from an emphasis on the negative to an emphasis on the positive.\u00a0 If we are able to pay more attention to the behavior we want, our children will see our smiling faces and want to repeat the good stuff!<\/p>\n

Again, if time-outs are\u00a0working<\/em>\u00a0for you (meaning the behaviors are getting\u00a0better<\/strong>\u00a0and you are\u00a0not<\/strong>\u00a0getting angrier), by all means…keep it.\u00a0 If, though, the time-outs are making everything\u00a0worse…try something new!<\/strong><\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

In my previous post, we discussed the efficacy of time-outs and why, ultimately, I am going to rarely recommend them. \u00a0Time-outs stop working, then the parent soon starts to struggle and fight with the child to get them into the designated spot and stay there. \u00a0This struggle only grows more power struggles between the parent and the child. So, what\u00a0is\u00a0a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[27],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1233","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-parenting"],"yoast_head":"\nTired of the Time Out? 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