{"id":1590,"date":"2013-12-18T14:13:43","date_gmt":"2013-12-18T19:13:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.positivelyparenting.com\/?p=1590"},"modified":"2015-12-04T12:56:37","modified_gmt":"2015-12-04T17:56:37","slug":"for-the-child-who-is-hitting","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/fear\/for-the-child-who-is-hitting\/","title":{"rendered":"Loving the Child Who is Hitting"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
Your lovely and beautiful child is hitting\u2026and hitting often.<\/p>\n

When your child is hitting, ask yourself some of these questions:<\/p>\n

1) How old is my child?<\/span> \u00a0<\/b>A two year old can hit A LOT. \u00a0It’s pretty normal. \u00a0In fact, it is the most violent and aggressive time in a human’s life! \u00a0Read this<\/span><\/a><\/span> for more info!<\/p>\n

An eight year old, typically, hits far less. \u00a0You have two totally different ways of handling different ages. \u00a0(Will get to this more. \u00a0The point is: age and developmental stage\u00a0matter<\/i>.)<\/p>\n

2). What is the frustration causing the hitting?<\/b><\/span> \u00a0<\/span> \u00a0Is it that the language is not there and the frustration erupts as a hit? \u00a0Has the child been\u00a0trying\u00a0<\/i>to make her point, and no one is listening? \u00a0Has he been interrupted? \u00a0Told to hush? \u00a0Told to suck it up?<\/p>\n

3). How can I help the child adapt to this frustration?<\/b> <\/span>\u00a0This means that there is often nothing<\/b> any of us can do about life\u2019s frustrations, but that doesn’t mean we cannot remain emotionally open and kind to our child. \u00a0The child will have\u00a0tears<\/b> and you can allow it. \u00a0Those\u00a0tears\u00a0<\/b>are a sign of their expectations meeting with the reality of the world. \u00a0There is not one more cookie. \u00a0It is time for bed. \u00a0The i-device is going away. \u00a0UGH! \u00a0This SUCKS. \u00a0And then, after some tears\u2026I feel better. \u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n

This is\u00a0human. \u00a0We all do it. \u00a0At least, we should be doing it.<\/b><\/p>\n

\"iStock_000017328378Small\"<\/a>If a child has violent outbursts, often, this child needs the LEAST frustration in his life. \u00a0Why?<\/p>\n

This is like, let’s say, someone is starving. \u00a0Literally starving to death. \u00a0You cannot give the body a Big Mac and a piece of pie (more than it needs). \u00a0You\u00a0ease<\/i>\u00a0<\/b>the body into calories and nutrients, until the body\u00a0can handle\u00a0many foods.<\/b><\/p>\n

Children who are easily frustrated and aggressive do not need MORE problems. \u00a0They need to be\u00a0eased<\/i> into frustration, so keep it light. \u00a0As the child becomes more experienced at adapting to frustration, he can handle more and more!<\/p>\n

Regular frustrations?<\/b> \u00a0How can the family get through it? \u00a0For instance, my three year old hits me, and then throws herself on the ground during dinner. \u00a0Well, this is not totally unusual. \u00a0We give her some love, give her some time, and welcome her back to the table when she comes back.<\/p>\n

When my ten year old hits and yells, this signals me that something is wrong<\/b>. \u00a0Hunger? \u00a0Fatigue? \u00a0School? \u00a0Friend stuff? \u00a0Homework? \u00a0Worries? \u00a0I give her space and stay close, don’t take it personally, ask open-ended questions…wait for her to open up. \u00a0Sometimes it is a problem, sometimes it is hormonal. \u00a0 It is my job to be steady and non-punitive, in both cases. \u00a0This requires patience, self-care, a solid partnership, and good friends.<\/p>\n

 <\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Your lovely and beautiful child is hitting\u2026and hitting often. When your child is hitting, ask yourself some of these questions: 1) How old is my child? \u00a0A two year old can hit A LOT. \u00a0It’s pretty normal. \u00a0In fact, it is the most violent and aggressive time in a human’s life! \u00a0Read this for more info! An eight year old, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[91],"tags":[272,268,270,273,136,271,8],"class_list":["post-1590","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fear","tag-aggression","tag-anger","tag-children","tag-development","tag-frustration","tag-hitting","tag-parenting"],"yoast_head":"\nLoving the Child Who is Hitting - Meghan Leahy Parent Coach<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/fear\/for-the-child-who-is-hitting\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Loving the Child Who is Hitting - Meghan Leahy Parent Coach\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Your lovely and beautiful child is hitting\u2026and hitting often. When your child is hitting, ask yourself some of these questions: 1) How old is my child? \u00a0A two year old can hit A LOT. \u00a0It’s pretty normal. \u00a0In fact, it is the most violent and aggressive time in a human’s life! \u00a0Read this for more info! 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