{"id":301,"date":"2011-10-24T14:18:13","date_gmt":"2011-10-24T14:18:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.positivelyparenting.com\/?p=301"},"modified":"2015-12-04T12:49:53","modified_gmt":"2015-12-04T17:49:53","slug":"waiting","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/parenting\/waiting\/","title":{"rendered":"Waiting…"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
The questions almost always begin the same:<\/p>\n

\u201cHow can I get my kid\u2026\u201d <\/em><\/p>\n

How can I get my kid\u2026to put on his own shoes?\u00a0 To set the table?\u00a0 To be kinder to his sister?\u00a0 To do his homework when I tell him to do it?\u00a0 To walk to the car without running away?\u00a0 To eat his dinner without getting up?\u00a0 To feel more confident?<\/p>\n

And the other sentence I hear even more<\/em> is:<\/p>\n

\u201cHow can I get my kid to STOP\u2026\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

How can I get my kid to stop hitting?\u00a0 To stop whining?\u00a0 To stop saying \u201cno\u201d to me?\u00a0 To stop ignoring me?\u00a0 To stop being so aggressive?\u00a0 To stop watching so much TV?\u00a0 To stop teasing the baby\/dog\/little sister?<\/p>\n

I get it.\u00a0 These are the exact same questions I had over five years ago (and even as recently as this morning), looking down at my eldest child, not knowing where to turn or what to do.\u00a0 I had problems<\/em> and I wanted solutions.\u00a0 <\/em>NOW.\u00a0 I was tired of struggling, tired of feeling unsure, and incredibly tired of waiting for it to get better.<\/p>\n

And isn\u2019t that it?\u00a0 Aren\u2019t we, as parents, always waiting for \u201cit to get better\u201d?\u00a0 If my spouse stops traveling for work, if the cold goes away, if the rain stops falling, if my hours become sane at work, if I could make a decent meal, if I could just exercise a little more, eat a little less, sleep a little more, complain a little less\u2026then (THEN) everything will \u201cget back to normal.\u201d<\/p>\n

But normal never comes, does it?\u00a0 The sun comes out, you run outside.\u00a0 You go to bed, you wake up.\u00a0 You drink your coffee, and eat a bowl of Cheerios.\u00a0 You change diapers, little feet in the air.\u00a0 You push swings, type on keyboards, make the appointments, run late to the appointments, find and make some dinner, wash the dishes, find the permission slip, practice the piano, wash hair, kick the soccer ball, read the book, take the temperature, clean the floor, kiss the boo-boo, wipe a nose, make the lunch, feel too tired to go to gym, and there it is: your abnormal\/normal life.<\/p>\n

When I stopped waiting \u201cfor everything to get better”, I could actually attend to what needed to happen in the moment.\u00a0 I am not saying that you cannot make plans (you have to) or that the future isn\u2019t there (it is, we hope).\u00a0 It\u2019s just that you cannot live<\/em> there.\u00a0 You cannot spend your life, your parenthood, waiting<\/em> for things to get better.<\/p>\n

So, I have a four year old who can become a tad aggressive with the baby (who is not the baby anymore; she is a toddler).\u00a0 Rather than turn to comfortable trio of worry, anger, and fear when I see her starting to tackle the toddler, I redirect (Hey, I need help making toast, please) or I only notice her when she is gentle (Wow Louise, when you share with Gigi, I feel relaxed because the house is filled with happy sounds). \u00a0I wake up ready to try<\/em> to do these things everyday, with a smile and optimism because that’s all I have. \u00a0Practice, forgiveness, practice, forgiveness. \u00a0A dash of responsibility with a healthy dollop of acceptance. \u00a0Everyday. \u00a0Every moment.<\/p>\n

Some days are better than others, but isn\u2019t that life?\u00a0 Everyday is different from the last.\u00a0 Filled with seemingly the same minutiae, yet totally different. \u00a0Embrace today, right now. \u00a0It’s all you have, it’s where your life lives<\/em>.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The questions almost always begin the same: \u201cHow can I get my kid\u2026\u201d How can I get my kid\u2026to put on his own shoes?\u00a0 To set the table?\u00a0 To be kinder to his sister?\u00a0 To do his homework when I tell him to do it?\u00a0 To walk to the car without running away?\u00a0 To eat his dinner without getting up?\u00a0 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[27],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-301","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-parenting"],"yoast_head":"\nWaiting... - Meghan Leahy Parent Coach<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/parenting\/waiting\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Waiting... - Meghan Leahy Parent Coach\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"The questions almost always begin the same: \u201cHow can I get my kid\u2026\u201d How can I get my kid\u2026to put on his own shoes?\u00a0 To set the table?\u00a0 To be kinder to his sister?\u00a0 To do his homework when I tell him to do it?\u00a0 To walk to the car without running away?\u00a0 To eat his dinner without getting up?\u00a0 [...]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/parenting\/waiting\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Meghan Leahy Parent Coach\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-10-24T14:18:13+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2015-12-04T17:49:53+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Meghan Leahy\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Meghan Leahy\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/parenting\/waiting\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/parenting\/waiting\/\",\"name\":\"Waiting... - Meghan Leahy Parent Coach\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2011-10-24T14:18:13+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2015-12-04T17:49:53+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/#\/schema\/person\/e4e0d31e5da894d0dcd2c68ae07bcdc3\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/parenting\/waiting\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/parenting\/waiting\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/parenting\/waiting\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Waiting…\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/\",\"name\":\"Meghan Leahy Parent Coach\",\"description\":\"Helping parents. 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