{"id":904,"date":"2012-11-10T12:30:20","date_gmt":"2012-11-10T17:30:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.positivelyparenting.com\/?p=904"},"modified":"2015-12-04T12:49:11","modified_gmt":"2015-12-04T17:49:11","slug":"duct-tape-experiment-days-two-through-five","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/parenting\/duct-tape-experiment-days-two-through-five\/","title":{"rendered":"DUCT TAPE EXPERIMENT, DAYS TWO THROUGH FIVE"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
Whoa…sorry I have not updated this more!<\/p>\n

I was so busy shutting-up and voting and parenting and working…that I was only keeping notes during the week.<\/p>\n

For every single parent who does this, you will have your own experience, your own learning curve, or as Queen Oprah calls it, your own “A-ha! moment.”<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Day Two \u00a0= HOT MESS \u00a0\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

<\/strong>Louise lies on the floor and declares “she is not going to school,” and all I could do was stare at her. \u00a0My thoughts whirled: “She always pulls this crap” and “she knows I don’t feel well” and “why does she have to be the difficult one?” \u00a0She was still in her pajamas and we were ten minutes away from leaving. \u00a0Because I could not speak, my only option was to act. \u00a0I put her in the car (still in her PJ’s) and she got dressed there. \u00a0She cried and yelled, and then her older sister cried and yelled…and the funny part? \u00a0I was the only person\u00a0not<\/em> crying and yelling! \u00a0As horrible and terrible and frustrating as this situation\u00a0felt, there was a strange comfort in knowing I\u00a0could not talk. \u00a0Was I making the situation better? \u00a0I don’t know. \u00a0Was I making it worse? \u00a0Absolutely not. \u00a0And everyone made it school on time.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Day Three = Getting Better, but not Great<\/strong><\/p>\n

<\/strong>I woke up, brushed my teeth, and slapped that bandaid on. \u00a0My overwhelming thought was, “Thank God I cannot talk<\/strong>.” \u00a0Isn’t that interesting? \u00a0I was so relieved at the prospect of staying quiet, that that feeling stayed with me all morning. \u00a0When the two year old threw her food on the floor, I couldn’t yell. \u00a0When the five year old could not find her shoes (AGAIN), I silently waited outside (she found them and put them on in the car). \u00a0The amazing part is that, while the behavior wasn’t perfect, it really wasn’t any worse. \u00a0I kept waiting for everything to go to hell-in-a-handbasket…it never did.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Day Four = The Kids Don’t Like It<\/strong><\/p>\n

<\/strong>The kids have overwhelmingly voted for me to take the band-aid OFF. \u00a0I find this amusing and interesting, because\u00a0of course they want to take it off! \u00a0They want me to start to manage them again!<\/em>\u00a0 <\/strong>Nope, not falling for that. \u00a0They are acutely uncomfortable in this new role of “Do something for yourself” and they are really throwing it at me this morning. \u00a0The whining has been upped, and the sloth-like slowness is manifesting earlier. \u00a0The only kid who is behaving better and better is the two year old. \u00a0Her whining? \u00a0Significantly decreased. \u00a0Throwing of toys and breakables? \u00a0Far less. \u00a0Amazing, really. \u00a0The other two kids should take a page out of her book.<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\"\"<\/a>Day Five = The Wheels Have Come Off the Wagon<\/strong><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
The band aid is on, but I am speaking out of the corner of my mouth. \u00a0Speaking is stretching it…I am more muttering, in a loud way. \u00a0The baby has a high fever, I am not feeling well, and\u00a0I have had it<\/strong>. \u00a0I have had it with this stupid experiment, I have had it with being in control, with being quiet. \u00a0I am ready to yell and let the kids have it.<\/div>\n
\n
“Met in da gawddamn caw!” \u00a0I mumble out of the side of my mouth.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
“What? We cannot understand you, Mom!”<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\u00a0“Met in da gawddamn caw!”<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
“Mom…what?”<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
And that is when I laugh. \u00a0I mean, really belly laugh. \u00a0I am a parent coach. \u00a0I have a princess band-aid taped over my mouth, and I am STILL trying to control my kids. \u00a0This shit is funny, I am sorry. \u00a0It is.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\n
<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
What did I Learn?<\/strong><\/div>\n
\n
    \n
  1. I need to take more time to train my kids to do chores. \u00a0They are pretty good now, but\u00a0I (ME)<\/strong>\u00a0need to make more time.<\/li>\n
  2. I am a little afraid of natural consequences. \u00a0I am afraid of sending them to school without lunch. \u00a0Why? \u00a0I don’t know yet.<\/li>\n
  3. I loved being quiet. \u00a0The sound of my own voice makes me want to jump off a cliff.<\/li>\n
  4. Over-parenting is easy. \u00a0Sounding positive is easy. \u00a0Sounding encouraging is easy. \u00a0Silence is deeply hard. \u00a0And profound.<\/li>\n
  5. I am so glad I did this, and will do it again.<\/li>\n
  6. I am glad it is over. \u00a0\ud83d\ude42<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

     <\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Whoa…sorry I have not updated this more! I was so busy shutting-up and voting and parenting and working…that I was only keeping notes during the week. For every single parent who does this, you will have your own experience, your own learning curve, or as Queen Oprah calls it, your own “A-ha! moment.”   Day Two \u00a0= HOT MESS \u00a0\u00a0 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[27],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-904","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-parenting"],"yoast_head":"\nDUCT TAPE EXPERIMENT, DAYS TWO THROUGH FIVE - Meghan Leahy Parent Coach<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/mlparentcoach.com\/new\/parenting\/duct-tape-experiment-days-two-through-five\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"DUCT TAPE EXPERIMENT, DAYS TWO THROUGH FIVE - Meghan Leahy Parent Coach\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Whoa…sorry I have not updated this more! 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